by Joy Strange

Here’s a story I haven’t heard anything about on NPR; Good Vibes, the legendary pro-sex and pro-woman sex toy outlet has been sold to a “mainstream porn” group. That according to Violet Blue’s blog, which links to an SF Chronicle article by Phil Bronstein reporting the sale (which actually happened in 2007)  and the differences of opinion regarding changes in attitude and quality of the chain overall since it changed hands.

Is Good Vibes still a shop for women? Is it shifting to a more degraded sleaze-bag porn store mentality? You be the judge.

Regardless of how you feel about the sale of Good Vibes itself, what impresses me here is the quality of the reportage. This story is treated well, it’s given a fair and balanced treatment, and there are actual human feelings evident. That’s something that wouldn’t be possible in the hands of a lesser writer, smirking about a sex toy shop controversy.

Aspiring sex writers, read and take notes. This is one to aspire to.

Posted in Sex Writing Blogs, sex writing tips | 72 Comments »

by Joy Strange

Aspiring sex writers take note–if you’re a new writer (and not just a new sex writer) it’s great to have a niche to pursue, but don’t limit yourself to just sex writing if you are looking for published clips.

I always encourage new writers to try a variety of topics to make sure they don’t miss any other part of their expertise or skill sets they can write about for money. I totally get those who want to specialize in sex writing only–but niche writing of any kind can be challenging to break into, and you might just have other marketable writing topics that can help you get by in the meantime.

The key is to take your skills, give them a good, long examination and try to find the specialties you can write about most effectively. Writers with no clips are at a serious disadvantage, so try to build your portfolio while you hone your sex writing skills at the same time.

The best way to start sharpening your sex writing skills is–no duh–to start a blog that’s all about the kind of sex writing you want to do. You’ll build a nice little network of like-minded friends and colleagues if you offer guest blog posts and do guest blog posts on other blogs.

The part of this advice that’s not so “no duh”? Try to make your guest blog posts upwardly mobile…try to guest post on a site slightly better than yours and offer guest blog post slots to the writers you really want to emulate. You can also do interviews with your favorite sex writers and build a bit of clout that way. Market yourself without appearing to do so, just by offering some decent space on your site for your favorite sex blogger or author.

As a new sex writer, hell–as a new writer period, you’ve got to put your name and your work out there and make yourself a known quantity.

Posted in Sex Writing Blogs, Sex Writing Career Advice | 5 Comments »

by Joy Strange

So admittedly I have a new favorite blog about once a week, but that doesn’t lessen the impact of the fascinating And The Strangest Things Suddenly Seem Routine. The thing I like about this blog best? It’s written by an “ex-missionary”.

Since this blog is about rope bondage and related pleasures, it makes for an intriguing introduction to the writings of Monk, the rope-meister.

For me to say this blog is “about” bondage is probably a bit misleading. There is discussion of the rope-making business Monk runs, a bit of sex writing here and there, but this is one of those pleasantly surprising blogs that doesn’t obsess solely over the sex aspect–there’s plenty of personal writing here (my favorite kind) and Monk’s style is EXACTLY what we strive to communicate at SexWriter–there should be no stigma whatsoever about your sexual writing, leanings, pastimes, etc.

Of all the blogs I’ve seen lately, this is one of the most well-rounded. Loving it! And if you have a need for some pretty rope for your binding and fasting needs (as in, making something fast as opposed to religious fasting) check out Monk’s rope retail site, TwistedMonk.com which includes some very helpful instructional videos!

Posted in Sex Writing Blogs | 64 Comments »

by Joy Strange

I’m really enjoying the Best Sex Writing 2009 blog by Rachel Kramer Bussel, but I wish there were more recent entries. The one that caught my eye  (ok, my Google search) was the most recent entry, all about the slow sex movement in San Francisco. Interesting.

Sex positivity seems to be one of the central themes in this blog, and it got me dwelling on the idea that there’s a long way to go in this department. As a society, Americans are still so hung up on sex…some would say it’s like the 60s never happened.

But what WAS the 60s free love movement, anyway? It sounds like an idealist concept, but if you watch any of the documentaries on the era, you find that free love wasn’t as free as the hippie stererotypes imply. Even in the “peace and love” 60s, there was much to be scared of. Flower-power shelters and free clinics had to issue constant warnings about rape, STDs, and contraception. Like anything else, once you get past surface impressions, it’s a whole ‘nother reality.

Rachel K. Bussel’s blog is a good reminder that there’s a way to go with sex-positive thinking. In my view, as long as we have right-wing windbags trying to convince us that nudity equals pornography and that sexual imagery is somehow wrong and dirty (and that all those explosions and gun battles AREN’T), we’ve got an uphill run of it. But the SPs (sex-positives) do offer some hope. Thanks, Rachel, for some food for thought.

P.S. I love this sexy photo of Rachel posted on her blog, taken by Stacey Joy.

Posted in Sex Writing Blogs | 3 Comments »